CAPTAIN'S LOG 725

this is going to be me next year when I start entering...

Sat, 20 Apr 2013 09:58:50 -0500

this is going to be me next year when I start entering hospitals…

“Sarek” Ep. 23 Season 3 TNG Sarek (Spock’s...

Wed, 16 Jan 2013 09:29:13 -0600

“Sarek” Ep. 23 Season 3 TNG

Sarek (Spock’s Father) arrives on board the Enterprise for ambassador purposes. Unfortunately, he’s suffering from Vulcan Dementia and his emotions are OUT OF CONTROL. So he transfers them to Jean-Luc. If you want to see Captain Picard cry, this is your episode.

“The Most Toys” Ep. 22 Season 3 TNG Data is...

Wed, 16 Jan 2013 09:20:08 -0600

“The Most Toys” Ep. 22 Season 3 TNG

Data is kidnapped and added to an interplanetary collector’s collection. Geordi almost dies from grief. Then rummages through Data’s belongings. Do you guys remember that Data and Tasha Yar had an intimate relationship? I miss her.

Oh yea, I’m BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!! nerds, head nerd,...

Wed, 16 Jan 2013 08:40:08 -0600

Oh yea, I’m BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!!

nerds, head nerd, more nerds. damn, I missed you guys :)

"Hollow Pursuits" Ep. 21 Season 3 TNG

Wed, 16 Jan 2013 08:00:08 -0600

Oh god! How could I have stopped before this episode! We get introduced to my second favorite off-again on-again character: Lt. Reginald Barclay. Perhaps a high functioning autistic (did you know they’re getting rid of Asperger’s in the DSM?!) Barclay is incredibly endearing (he definitely has a cluster A personality disorder). This is also the episode I began HATING Wesley Crusher. I mean seriously, stop making fun of Barclay. It’s rude, you snot-filled son-of-a-wonderful-woman-who-needs-more-face-time-in-all-these-episodes.

Also this episode makes Geordi and Data look super kyute! ^_^ in that they both have to work together to make Barclay feel welcomed on the Enterprise. ADORABLE.

Also also, the holodeck is a terrible place to have fantasies. Especially since APPARENTLY anyone can just walk in on them at any time (GEORDI!) SUPER AWKS!

"Disaster" Ep. 5 Season 5 TNG

Thu, 05 Jul 2012 10:00:27 -0500

This is the episode in which I FELL in love with Worf and Picard became a lot more human.

"Tin Man" Ep. 20 Season 3 TNG

Mon, 25 Jun 2012 00:56:24 -0500

PLOT
A betazed, Tam, who is a specialist in first contact is brought onboard to deal with a life form like none the Federation has seen before. Also, unfortunately, the Romulans are eyeing it, and hell no Romulans aren’t getting that shiz. Also also unfortunately, the life form is orbiting a star that’s about to go Nova, so it’s literally going to die.

Eventually we learn that the life form was actually a ship, well, an organic ship, that was in a symbiotic relationship with its crew. Then, one fateful event killed all those crew members, and the sentient ship, labelled the “Tin Man” by the Federation, became listless and infinitely depressed. So. Much. Sadness.

Meanwhile, Tam, is a telepathic genius because he literally grew up with the ability to read other people’s minds, a power that all Betazeds have, but that most develop in their adolescence. So Tam has pretty much been skirting severe mental illness for his entire life. He finds a friend in the Tin Man, and the emptiness that surrounds it.

QUOTE
TAM: “It calls itself Gomtuu. It’s old, captain. It’s roamed the universe for many thousands of years.”
PICARD: “Where did it come from? How many—”
TAM: Far away. Maybe beyond the galaxy. Once there were millions of them.
PICARD: Once?
TAM: It hasn’t seen another of its kind for millennia. It’s alone. It may be the last of its species.
PICARD: Perhaps we can help it in some way. Can you ask it to return with us to Federation space? At least persuade it to leave the vicinity before the star explodes?
TAM: Captain Gomtuu knows the star will go nova soon. That’s why it’s here. It wants to die. There was an explosion in space. Radiation penetrating the outer layers. The crew… The crew died. Such loss. Empty pain. Hollowness. Tin man hurts and wants to die.”

“It is humanity he is fleeing.” - Data, talking about Tam

OBSERVATIONS
It is episodes like this that remind me that human depression, in relation to depression possible in space, is quite pathetic. It’s like that movie, “The Fountain.*”

*walks away, cries

“Captain’s Holiday” Ep. 19 Season 3...

Mon, 25 Jun 2012 00:22:46 -0500

“Captain’s Holiday” Ep. 19 Season 3 TNG

Picard enjoys a book (nerd) while on the planet Risa—a hedonistic society with an economy built entirely on tourism.

Picard goes on vacation to Risa, which I have to believe is kind of like the Las Vegas/Palm Springs of the galaxy. He runs into an archaeologist—a sexy archaeologist—who has stolen an artifact which is wanted by Vorgons from the FUTURE. (Vorgons sound a lot like Blorgons, the Tardises from Inspector Space Time (a Community creation)). Anyway, long story short, Picard kind of falls in love with a woman and the universe isn’t destroyed.

Also, if you imagine you’d like to see a shirtless Picard, this is the episode for you!

OBSERVATIONS

VORGONS! they sound so dangerous!

“Allegiance” Ep. 18 Season 3 TNG The bridge crew...

Sun, 24 Jun 2012 23:23:39 -0500

“Allegiance” Ep. 18 Season 3 TNG

The bridge crew traps two overly curious aliens in a forcefield; Worf looks on smugly.

Picard is kidnapped in the middle of the night and replaced by a double. A double who, strangely, has all of Picard’s memories, but has a terrible fear of letting people down. He also SEDUCES Beverly, and hijinks ensue.

“Sins of the Father” Ep. 17 Season 3 TNG Picard...

Sun, 24 Jun 2012 22:26:05 -0500

“Sins of the Father” Ep. 17 Season 3 TNG

Picard fights two Klingons to prove that he’s trustworthy? I guess? Klingons are weird.

Worf’s brother (whom he has not seen in like, decades) shows up on the Enterprise to inform Worf that there deceased father is being dishonored. Rumor has it that he helped the Romulans attack the colony he was on, with his family…. you know, the attack that made Worf an orphan.

It’s pretty awkward.

It’s also a lie. Something suspicious is happening on Q’onoS.

“The Offspring” Ep. 16 Season 3 TNG Data tries to...

Sun, 24 Jun 2012 20:57:18 -0500

“The Offspring” Ep. 16 Season 3 TNG

Data tries to get his teenage daughter employed at Ten Forward. Guinan is tentatively onboard with the idea.

Data embraces asexual reproduction and literally builds a child, using the design of his own positronic brain as a model.

But then things start spinning out of control, starting with Laal using a contraction (because Data’s programming does NOT allow him to say words like “doesn’t”), and ending with her having a nervous breakdown of androidesque proportions. She feels emotions! And yet Data never has (except for that one time when Q… well, yea.)

“Yesterday’s Enterprise” Ep. 15 Season 3...

Sat, 23 Jun 2012 13:55:00 -0500

“Yesterday’s Enterprise” Ep. 15 Season 3 TNG

Dear 24th century Earth, you’ve managed to end poverty and suffering, but you still haven’t gotten around to designing a goddamn seat belt for starships?

Star Trek, 2009

Fri, 22 Jun 2012 02:04:20 -0500

Star Trek, 2009

stupiditykills: (via My Dream Cast For A Star Trek The Next...

Thu, 21 Jun 2012 23:40:31 -0500

stupiditykills:

(via My Dream Cast For A Star Trek The Next Generation Reboot | The Mary Sue)

"A Matter of Perspective" Ep. 14 Season 3 TNG

Tue, 19 Jun 2012 17:21:48 -0500

PLOT
Riker is beamed off of a science space station just as it explodes, and shocker, now the planet’s officials want to try him for murder.

Essentially, there are three contradicting point of views presented on the holodeck over who killed Dr. Apgar, or at least how he died. Eventually, freak radiation sprouting around the ship leads Geordi to determine the real cause of the doctors death.

OBSERVATIONS
So Tasha Yar’s been dead for a long time, which means I haven’t heard the term “rape gangs” in like, forty-episodes. This episode, however, depicts a holo-image Riker, an evil Riker if you will, on the holodeck attempting to rape another holo-image person. I can’t stop thinking how weird it would be if rape was ever mentioned in the original series.

"Ah, diplomacy! I adore diplomacy! Everyone dresses so well."

Tue, 19 Jun 2012 16:11:42 -0500

“Ah, diplomacy! I adore diplomacy! Everyone dresses so well.”

- Lwaxana Troi, Star Trek: The Next Generation, 4x22: Half a Life (via badwolfcomplex)

They’re not on the holodeck… SO WHO THE HELL IS THAT...

Tue, 19 Jun 2012 15:45:05 -0500

They’re not on the holodeck… SO WHO THE HELL IS THAT NAKED WOMAN?

Engineering Similes! Thanks to a one Mr. Lt. Geordi La...

Tue, 19 Jun 2012 08:41:46 -0500

Engineering Similes! Thanks to a one Mr. Lt. Geordi La Forge.

(FROM EPISODE 13, SEASON 3: DEJA Q)

"Deja Q" Ep. 13 Season 3 TNG

Tue, 19 Jun 2012 06:31:52 -0500

A satellite is going to crash onto a planet which will cause landquakes and tsunamis. Oh, also an ice age.

PICARD: “Mr. La Forge is there any way the Enterprise could coax that satellite back where it belongs?”
GEORDI: “We’d need to apply a delta v of about 4 km/sec. Even with warp power to the tractor beam it would mean exceeding the recommended impulse engine output by at least 47%. It’d be like an ant pushing a tricycle, a slim chance at best.”

The Enterprise decides to help out. And then, apparently for no reason, Q appears. On the bridge. Naked. I’m pretty sure that would give me PTSD.

He was removed from the Q Continuum and turned mortal to punish him for spreading disaster throughout the galaxy. Why did he choose the Enterprise as the location for his banishment?

This is why:

“Because in all the universe, you are the closest thing I have to a friend, Jean-Luc.” - Q

Regardless, nobody believes that Q is telling the truth about his current condition.

Q: “What must I do to convince you people?”
WORF: “Die.”

And so Q is sent to the brig. In the meantime, The Enterprise is still trying to save a planet from being crashed into by its moon and suddenly it is being probed by an unknown source. So Picard goes to talk to Q. He let’s him out so that he can help Geordi get the moon to stop falling in to the planet.

Q: “I’ll have 10 chocolate sundaes.”

Q: “It’s difficult to work in a group when you’re omnipotent.”

Turns out that a group of aliens (energy entities!) want to kill Q. After Data saves his life once, Q begins to realize that although he thinks of humans as lowly, he will never be as good as them—not even as good as one who is merely mimicking them (Data). The aliens that want Q dead are willing to destroy the Enterprise to get to him. Knowing this, Q eventually commandeers a shuttle craft and escapes the Enterprise, where he hopes to draw off the aliens so that the Enterprise can save the planet.

It is at this moment that another Q from the continuum appears. AND HOLY CRAP! It’s that actor from Psych. The dad. Totally weird. Regardless, they have an interesting conversation (which sounds really pretentions/bourgeois-ish/#firstworldproblems), but in the end the other Q gives our Q his Q powers back.

So Q jumps back aboard the Enterprise with a Mariachi band is all like: “I’m BACK BABY!” He then gives Riker two hot, half naked babes, which Riker turns down, leading Q to say this:

Q: “You’re so stolid Riker. You weren’t like this before the beard.”

I have to agree. Then he gives Data a brief moment of an emotion (happiness). Which is odd, because Data laughs uncontrollably for like, 25 seconds. But you know it’s alright because Deanna Troi smiles, which means Data is actually having an emotion.

OBSERVATIONS

Such a weird episode. I actually like Q now. I WANT TO KILL MYSELF. This shouldn’t be happening. Q is evil, right? So why do I feel this way?

Also, if Q is all powerful, and if he really likes being on the Enterprise, couldn’t he just make himself invisible? I also kind of imagine him shrinking down to a minute size and scampering around Ten Forward making Guinan’s life as miserable as possible.

“That’s the fifteenth jug of Saurian Brandy we’ve lost this month! What the hell is going on here?”

LOLZ

“The High Ground” Ep. 12 Season 3 TNG ENTERPRISE...

Tue, 19 Jun 2012 04:22:01 -0500

“The High Ground” Ep. 12 Season 3 TNG

ENTERPRISE SHENANIGANS.